So I had a magnificent date! There were all of the key things you look for in a good date. He was funny, attractive, and very intelligent. We talked and laughed, and laughed and talked. We tasted different wines and he offered me his expertise and made the decision on which one we would settle on. I've been out with this guy before, and he always shows me something new and always a good time. Although he is a bit younger, he is very worldly and well versed. His attire was impeccable, he smelled divine, and he was a true gentleman. As he tucked me into his Mercedes (and all but put my seat belt on for me) I thought to myself "could he be the one?"...We were back at my place having yet another bottle of wine. We were knee deep in conversation and having some intense eye contact when out of nowhere his hand flies up to his face, right into his nose, and does a quick dig. I could not believe my eyes. He picked his nose right in front of me! My mind didn't know what to process first, the act itself, or keeping up with what he did with those fingers next! Look, I know that one of my issues is with germs. Touching a public door handle freaks me out. But I try not to be too anal. And I've certainly learned to pick my battles on the dating court but this was going too far. I kept thinking that he was going to wipe his hand somewhere, and that it better not be on my ecru sofa or on me! It was almost like he didn't even realize he did it or that it was offensive. It was such a swift and well crafted gesture that if I had turned away, I may not have noticed it at all. But I'm glad I did because that is just nasty! So here I am wondering: is a guy picking his nose on a date a deal breaker?
Ok, so he is a sweetheart, has a very good career and is so handsome that he could model! But it's because he was so polished that he should have known better. I found it hard to believe he didn't know enough not to pick his nose in a lady's presence. He was in a suit jacket for goodness sake! If he were a cocaine addict or compulsive gambler it would be easier to put into perspective. But this could be something he could easily change or at least hide. (Would hiding it be acceptable?)
I must admit that this incident put a damper on the evening, and I ended up doing my usual "runaway date" act where I fake an emergency. I was really disappointed. I was giving this guy the green light. I really liked him. A friend told me not to discount him over something so small compared to all of his other attributes. But I really don't know if I can deal with such a habit. And it isn't the sort of thing that you can mention to someone and hope that they will just stop.
Besides all of this, I had another date (not so long ago) where the guy did the same thing and then proceeded to put his fingers in his mouth and I almost lost my lunch. I don't know why digging in one's nose is so appealing. Because you are using your own fingers as the instrument, and then you have nowhere to put whatever goldmine you find up there. This habit seems to really be hard to break because I've seen people doing it everywhere, especially driving. And what is the fascination with tasting it? That is even worse than the act of nose picking. And if they are nose pickers, does that lead to eventually tasting it? I don't know how this works, but there has got to be some type of intervention available right?
Everyone has bad habits. And nobody is perfect. So what to do? This truly is not the worst thing in the world, but nevertheless, it is a dilemma. I enjoy my time with him and he really likes me. We both want the same things out of life, and we have a very intense attraction to one another. I am still trying to find out if this is something I can tolerate, or if I can get him to stop it! I know there are some things that you must tolerate within a relationship. I guess it's just up to the individual to gage. I think I am going to try again, and if it happens again, I am just going to call him out on it and remind him that we aren't 5 years old anymore and that picking his nose is not acceptable. If he continues and just can't help himself, I will have to do more soul searching, but hopefully he will be as considerate about this as he is about everything else, and just break the habit. Cross your fingers...
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